Mistake Pasta

Mistakes are inevitable. Everybody makes them, everybody gets upset about them, (almost) everybody wants to fix them. Most of the time, whatever error one has made can be either fixed or forgiven. And I think one of the wonderful things about food is that it makes up for those mistakes that we can't really fix or forgive ourselves for. How, you ask?
Well, I respond, 1) food is delicious and its deliciousness usually induces temporary amnesia, which is nice when you really don't want to think about how you screwed up that interview; crispy bacon is the perfect food choice for mistake amnesia because the crunch drowns out your thoughts and honestly, how can any self-respecting carnivore be unhappy while munching on bacon? Impossible.
2) when cooking, lots of mistakes can be made, but almost all of those mistakes can be fixed! Which brings me to the inspiration for this post.

Spaghetti squash caught my eye while strolling through Kroger, so I grabbed two, nestled them in my basket next to the salt and vinegar chips, checked out and went on my way. I ended up roasting them with some olive oil, salt, and pepper. Simple, classic, yummy; squash usually tastes best when it isn't too dressed up. But after roasting them, that evil devil, Wanna-Be-Chef-Celina, piped up and persuaded me to saute the strands of squash with basically everything I could find...that ended up including garlic, onions, shallots, LOTS AND LOTS of lemon zest and juice, lime zest and juice, herbs de Provence, parsley, and butter. This might not have been too horrible if I had gone much easier on the citrus, and actually cooked the garlic. But I didn't. This is one of the many reasons I will never be a chef: when I'm in the middle of cooking and a crazy idea crosses my mind, I employ that idea without a second thought.

It was a mistake. I ruined the dignity of that spaghetti squash. I tried to eat it but it was so acidic that it hurt my teeth, and so generally icky that I grimaced while chewing. So I plunked it all into an opaque tupperware container, tossed it in the back of the fridge, and tried to forget about it.
A couple of days later, when my teeth had recovered, I decided to face up to the pungent result of my impulsiveness. Here is a rough breakdown how I fixed it:

Mistake Pasta
Ingredients:
-a bunch of lemony, garlicky, icky spaghetti squash mistake mess
-linguini or spaghetti pasta noodles, 1 box
-1 part butter
-1 part flour
-milk
-salt and pepper to taste
-crushed red pepper flakes to taste
-Onion, sliced

1) With the butter, flour, and milk, make alfredo sauce. I didn't have a block of parmesan to grate into it, but if I did I would have totally gone for it.
2) Caramelize the onion in some butter and then add spaghetti squash to heat through.
3) Meanwhile, cook the pasta (al dente of course). Drain and do not rinse (the starch left on un-rinsed noodles helps sauce to cling to them. Pro tip! Rinse pasta only when you're making something like a cold pasta salad, so the noodles don't get gummy)
4) Add the onion and spaghetti squash mixture to the alfredo, then add the pasta. Stir, stir, stir. Add salt and pepper to taste, and crushed red pepper flakes.

Not too shabby for a terrible spaghetti squash dish gone awry, eh? It doesn't look like much, but alfredo usually never does. It tasted pretty good; creamy and mild, definitely citrus-y but not acidic (the alfredo cut through that). And my brother wanted me to mention that it won his apparently prestigious seal of approval.

So next time you think you've completely messed up any hope of being friends again with somebody, or messed up a supposedly easy broccoli recipe, try to look at the problem from a different, more delicious and definitely more positive perspective.

Cheers (I've always wanted to say cheers to somebody),
Celina.

The Best of Columbus: kickoff!

I'm almost ashamed to admit that, before today, I had never had a real taco. Taco Bell, despite being named after them, doesn't count. Neither does a reheated hard taco shell stuffed with ground beef (that has been seasoned with taco seasoning mix).

I have to also admit that I can't recall ever really craving tacos. But again, today was an exception. The entire morning at work (shoutout to Winans Fine Chocolates and Coffees!) I couldn't stop thinking about tacos. It may have been my foodie subconscious nagging at me to start this search for the best [enter food item] in Columbus. But that still doesn't answer the question: why tacos? 

I guess that will remain unanswered until I find the taco in Columbus that makes me close my eyes and think, yes. THAT'S why tacos. Even better, a taco that makes me say that out loud, in the restaurant. 

So today marks the beginning of this challenge I created for myself. Basically, I've made a list of different food items (buffalo chicken sandwich, oysters, cheese pizza, fried chicken, croissant, sushi, wings, taco, etc.) and for each item I will embark on a search for the absolute best one in Columbus. Hopefully along the way I'll learn some new things about the culture, history, and techniques behind each item. 

Thanks to my random aching for traditional Mexican food, tacos are the first! I am really excited to find the absolute best taco in Columbus, especially because today I went to the first taquería on my list, had my first authentic taco, and fell in love. But I still have many more tacos to enjoy, and only one can win! muahahahahaha side note:  I do an excellent evil laugh in person.

Criteria for best taco:

-Presentation: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

-Balance of Flavors: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

-Creativity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

-Overall Quality: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

The "grades" for each taco I try will be included, as well as comments and mini reviews of each restaurant. 

I leave you with the sexiest, funniest song you will ever hear about tacos: Taco Grande

Critically yours,

Celina.

Ginger Cookies with Pomegranate Molasses (AKA Anger Cookies)

I should say straight away that I am by no stretch of the imagination a baker. A baker is patient, practically OCD with the measurements, and wicked organized. I am, of course, non of the above with a delightful mix of insanely messy, too proud to admit that maybe I should have measured out that flour, and inability follow a recipe. That being said, working at a chocolate shop has really activated my once-dormant sweet tooth, so the prospect of eating dessert is actually enough motivation for me to make it! 

Today, I made ginger cookies but substituted pomegranate molasses with the regular molasses in the recipe. This was the lovely idea of a lovely man named Josh Cook, who " love[s] ginger cookies and just got far too excited at the prospect of such a treat!!!!"(the treat being pomegranate ginger cookies). So thank you, Josh! Be sure to use a sweeter pomegranate molasses for this. The bottles don't really say whether it's sweet or super sour, but you can either ask the store owner or tilt the bottle. If the contents look a bit clumpy and really dark, almost black, then it's most likely the sour kind. If the contents are very smooth and lighter, and the nutrition label says it has over 5 grams of sugar in an 8.8 oz bottle, it's the sweet stuff. I don't recommend drinking the sweet stuff. Blech.

Other adjustments I made to this recipe include:

-grinding my own spices (1 tsp whole cloves, 1 tbsp chrystallized ginger, 1 stick cinnamon) This isn't absolutely necessary but the difference between freshly ground spices as opposed to God-knows-how-long-that's-been-in-the-cupboard spices is staggering. I also grated a 1-inch piece of fresh ginger and mixed that into the wet ingredients. 

-omitted 2/3 of the sugar in the cookies. I still rolled them in sugar, but I'm not a fan of super sweet cookies, and cutting a bit of sugar out helps. These turned out, in my opinion, perfectly, faintly sweet.

-took out my anger into the creamed butter and sugar. Yes, I tried to get my little brother to be my assistant. Yes, I asserted my dominance over him by using a condescending tone of voice and throwing him out of the kitchen when he acted skeptical of pomegranate molasses in cookies. No, I did not feel good about it. I think the cookie gods punished me by making some of the cookies run together on the cookie sheet, which i just HATE. Also, my spatula may or may not have snapped in half...

So here is the recipe with my adjustments included, go wild! Remember to throw some forgiveness and humility in yours, and the cookie gods might smile on you. But who knows, they are fickle SOB's. 

INGREDIENTS:

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour ½ tsp whole cloves, 1 stick cinnamon, 1 tbsp chrystallized ginger, ground together 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/4 teaspoon salt 1-inch piece of fresh ginger, grated

3/4 cup butter, softened 2/3 cup white sugar 1 egg 1 tablespoon water 1/4 cup pomegranate molasses 2 tablespoons white sugar

DIRECTIONS:

1.	Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Sift together the flour, ground spices , baking soda, and salt. Set aside.
2.	In a large bowl, cream together the butter and 2/3 cup sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the egg, then stir in the water, fresh ginger, and molasses. Gradually stir the sifted ingredients into the molasses mixture. Shape dough into walnut sized balls, and roll them in the remaining 2 tablespoons of sugar. Place the cookies 2 inches apart onto an ungreased cookie sheet, and flatten slightly.
3.	Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in the preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before removing to a wire rack to cool completely. Store in an airtight container. Note: try not to break your spatula in half, it only fuels any possible anger you might be feeling. Yields 24 cookies.

My results: Absolutely delicious cookies, but I couldn’t really taste the pom molasses, which is rather unfortunate. Since I’m not a baker, I don’t really know if doubling the pomegranate molasses would completely ruin the cookies or not. If you really want to go for that pomegranate flavor, it’s worth a shot! They did, however, have just a hint of tangy-ness, which I enjoyed. Besides that, the cookies were crumbly, had a nice sugar crust on the outside, and tender on the inside. They’d be perfect with a cup of coffee in the morning, especially since they’re not cloyingly sweet.

What I learned today: Ginger is the queen of spices. Mmmmm.

Spicily yours,

Celina.

10 Benefits of Eating Chinese Food

1)      It’s the perfect TV watching food. Nothing too crispy to overpower the sound of the TV, perfect balance of savory and sweet, nice chewy noodles that are perfect for munching on while contemplating The Doctor’s next move…

2)      The first bite makes your heart smile. Nevermind that the last bite makes you feel desperate and sad and also a bit guilty now that you’re mopping up the leftover sauce with your finger…You can always order more!

3)      If all you’ve eaten all day are sodium free foods, it provides at least a day’s worth of sodium! If you have eaten salt all day, then you have enough sodium for tomorrow!

4)      It satisfies one’s craving for sweet, salty, crunchy, chewy, and greasy, all in one!

5)      General Tso’s sauce makes eating broccoli more fun than does Hidden Valley Ranch.

6)      Fortune cookies: free therapy session.

7)      Induces sleepiness, and sleep is imperative for a healthy brain and body. Therefore we can assume that Chinese food is healthy!

8)      It tastes good cold. Better than cold pizza.

9)      It’s a delicious example of America’s impeccable knack for turning a traditionally healthy food culture into a cheap guilty pleasure.

10)  Its deliciousness distracts from life’s problems for a little while.

This man's face speaks truth.

Now that you have ten reasons to pick up the phone and order 25 crab rangoons, a quart of hot and sour soup, and 3 orders of General Tso's chicken confidently, go on! For cheap and sinfully delicious Chinese, I recommend Hong Kong on Hard Rd. and Smokey Row Rd.  Their food is consistent, they offer hot tea while you wait (i don't know about you, but free hot tea is definitely a deal breaker), it's family owned, and they have a lunch special of basically any dish you want with a side of rice and any soup for just $4.75! I have yet to find a better deal than that.

Hungrily yours,

Celina.

The sexiest form of pomegranate

I have a lot of the same problems as other people: how on earth I’m going to pay my car payment this month, which cheese to buy at the colossal Whole Foods cheese counter, how to make my love handles less prominent in my favorite pair of jeans that have suddenly gotten tighter, how to spend yet another valentine-less Valentine’s day…but I also have problems that I find to be exclusive to me, mostly because of my strangeness. Today, it was how to use up the last of the pomegranate molasses left in the bottle.

What IS pomegranate molasses, you ask?

Ha. Haha. Oh, my dear, unfortunate, non-Arab reader. I suggest you get some and find out for yourself, because try as I may to describe it, this lovely tart, pommy lovesyrup is something that must be tasted.

I was born and raised in Syria, where pomegranate molasses is used in quite a few dishes, such as fatayer (mini savory pies filled with either spinach or meat), bamye o riz (okra in tomato sauce served over rice), and other various exotic sounding items. I will tell you that it adds a really nice earthy tartness to a dish, a flavor that’s pretty much uniquely pomegranate. But I’ve always preferred my dibis rimaan (that’s pom molasses in Arabic) dribbled straight from the bottle onto my finger, into my mouth, or, my absolute favorite, into a little Turkish coffee cup and sprinkled with salt then eaten slowly with a tiny little silver spoon. I savored every little taste of that dibis.

Now that you’re informed, you can (maybe) imagine my frustration at having a good inch of syrup left at the bottom of the bottle, but knowing that even if I poured it out, there would still be some left inside and I would have to throw it away and I simply can’t bear to because that is precious childhood nostalgia in deep mahogany syrup form. So tonight, I decided to pour some water right into the bottle, shake it until it was all incorporated and delightfully frothy, sprinkle some salt in (a necessary addition), and drink it!

I’m in concentrated pomegranate heaven. I would post a picture of it, but it’s practically all gone.

So instead, here are some facts about the wonderful pomegranate!

-A glass of pomegranate juice has more antioxidants than red wine, cranberries, blueberries, and green tea.

-pomegranates contain phytochemicals that stimulate serotonin receptors, which supposedly means it improves symptoms of depression! Or it just makes you happy J

-Many scholars believe that the forbidden fruit that Eve indulged in was a pomegranate, not an apple.

If you want to find pomegranate molasses, I’d suggest going to your local Middle Eastern market or store. Sometimes supermarkets have it, but it’s usually overpriced.

I will post a recipe using pomegranate molasses soon!

Fruitfully yours ,

Celina.

Hello! Perhaps the best way to start a blog is with a poem. Or more specifically, an ode to a most delightful food item.

Ode to Honey in my Tea

I like pouring honey into my morning tea.

Honey, stretching out languidly

After a relaxing evening in its pitcher.

Honey, sparkling and winking at me

As if to say,

“Hey check this out!

Sexy, huh?”

As it reaches dramatically for the liquid

Inside my ceramic mug.

Then honey, in all of its vintage magic,

And all of its cheeky charm,

Performs a single perfect cannonball

Elongated into flips and twirls

And rather arrogant spins

Inside my tea.

Then it melts,

Losing its flexible shape,

But resurrects itself

On my tongue,

Where it blossoms

Into sweetness.